A Time to Laugh

Kristen tagged me. With this:

If I could be a scientist…If I could be a farmer…If I could be a musician…If I could be a doctor…If I could be a painter…If I could be a gardener…If I could be a missionary…If I could be a chef…If I could be an architect…If I could be a linguist…If I could be a psychologist…If I could be a librarian…If I could be an athlete…If I could be a lawyer…If I could be an inn-keeper…If I could be a professor…If I could be a writer…If I could be a llama-rider…If I could be a bonnie pirate… If I could be a photographer… If I could be an astronaut…If I could be a world famous blogger…If I could be a justice on any one court in the world…If I could be married to any current famous political figure…

If I could be a scientist, I’d discover a cure for acne.
If I could be a farmer, I’d grow all tomatoes and Georgia Bell peaches.
If I could be a musician, I’d sing show tunes all day all the time. Yes, I’d be really annoying.
If I could be a doctor. . . I am! Well, not that kind. But if I were a medical doctor, I’d tell other doctors to grow a soul.
If I could be a painter, I’d paint flowers.
If I could be a gardener, I’d grow flowers. And rid the world of black spot.
If I could be a missionary, I’d go to France. Maybe then I could improve my 2nd languge skills.
If I could be a chef, I’d figure out how to make cheesecake with no dairy.
If I could be an architect, I’d build the Brady house in my backyard.
If I could be a linguist, I’d be on the Enterprise as their universal translator.
If I could be a psychologist, I’d be psychoanalyzing everyone. It’d be REALLY annoying.
If I could be a librarian, I’d finally get all my reading done.
If I could be an athlete, I’d ice skate. That looks sooo fun.
If I could be a lawyer, I’d make a law against lawyer jokes.
If I could be an inn-keeper, I’d have some place really pretty with lots of flowers, dairy-free cheesecake, and lots of books. In France.
If I could be a professor… DONE!
If I could be a writer. . . . I’d publish my dissertation. I’m gonna do that sometime.
If I could be a llama-rider, I’d name him Lloyd the Llama. I’ve always wanted to do that.
If I could be a bonnie pirate, I’d write songs about my adventures and make my children into seagulls . . .. WAIT.
If I could be a photographer, I’d take pictures of dogs and babies.
If I could be an astronaut, I’d eat freeze-dried dairy-free cheesecake.
If I could be a world famous blogger, I’d change my name. I don’t want anyone knowing I’m here.
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world, I’d think big — Supreme Court!
If I could be married to any current famous political figure, I’d ask myself why I’d want to be married to one when I could BE that famous political figure. :/

I’ve been meaning to do this for awhile. Here are our versions of the famous song:

The wheels on the bus go round and round
The wipers on the bus go swish, swish, swish
The horn on the bus goes beep, beep, beep
The money on the bus goes chingalingaling
The driver on the bus says ‘Move on back!’
The people on the bus go up and down
The daddies on the bus say ‘I love you.’
The mommies on the bus say ‘You’re so sweet.’
The grandmas on the bus say ‘Gimme a kiss.’
The grandpas on the bus say ‘Tickle, tickle, tickle’
The aunties on the bus say ‘I have gum.’
The uncles on the bus say ‘I’m gonna gitcha.’ or ‘pull my finger’
The nurslings on the bus say ‘pah-poo, pah-poo, pah’
The Isaac’s on the bus say ‘bus, bus, TRUCK!’
The babies on the bus say ‘Wa, wa, wa’
The children on the bus say ‘Let’s play games.’
The paint on the bus is yellow, yellow, yellow
The sign on the bus says ‘Please stop now.’
The letters on the bus say ‘B-J-U’
The mirrors on the bus show what’s behind.
The tires on the bus are bald, bald, bald
The grill on the bus is full of bugs
The lights on the bus go blink, blink, blink
The seats on the bus go squeak, squeak, squeak
The floor on the bus is sticky-icky-icky
The windows on the bus they stay closed tight
The doors on the bus they open and close
The A/C on the bus it keeps us cool
The heater on the bus is keeps us warm
The brakes on the bus go skreech, skreech, skreech
The pistons on the bus go in and out
The axel on the bus is cracked, cracked, cracked
The engine on the bus goes vroom, vroom, vroom
The gears on the bus go grind, grind, grind
The clutch on the bus goes smoke, smoke, smoke
The gas on the bus goes slosh, slosh, slosh
The oil on the bus goes burn, burn, burn
The muffler on the bus goes putt, putt, BANG